10:36 About to start watching the results show. Shocked no one has blown it for me yet.
10:37 Ben Stiller is an actor. Bill Hader. Also an actor. Hank Azaria. Actor/Bart Simpson. Fat kid from Superbad. Fatter than I remembered. Hader and Superbad kid are hilarious. Glad I didn’t FF this part.
10:39 FF through the judges. Pretty sure we know who they are at this point.
10:39 FF right through those stupid Ford commercials. Here’s how Ford should turn around their business. Hmmm. Let’s start by NOT spending a billion dollars a year on advertising on American Idol and maybe instead put that money into R & D. Big fan of the Ford Fusion, but I’m not buying one. Sorry. Who is this chick on stage? Who is this dude from Rowanda? I’m confused. See, TiVo isn’t all fun and games. It’s confusing. And something tells me that’s not how kids in Rowanda dress. Pretty sure they don’t have throwback Adidas sneakers.
10:42 Finally some results. Gokey first to the stage. Did you see his lookalike that I posted yesterday? SteGold took those pictures in case you give a shit. Talk Talk Talk. Let’s get to it. FF through the trip bit.
10:44 Dim the lights. Here we go. Judges recap. Yeah, Danny takes a seat. No way anyone was going anywhere this soon.
10:45 Kris Allen. Free cheese dip for life. That’s something to give Gelles a hard on. FF through the trip. Judges recap. Huge # of votes. blah blah blah. Take a seat buddy.
10:47 Jordan Sparks. Let’s see how this goes. I don’t like when they do new stuff. I want to hear the shit that made them successful. Giving this about 30 seconds. Jordan looks good, if that’s your thing. Funny that she was originally linked to Chris Brown. FF.
10:49 Adam Lambert. Not sure about the white suspenders and the Mr. Smee shirt. FF though his trip. Pretty sure that if I had to go “home” I wouldn’t be thanking Mr. Christiansen at good old SHS.
10:51 Dim the lights, here we go. Judges recap. My stomach is growling for some reason. Adam has very white teeth. To the couch you go. FF.
10:52 88 million votes last night. wow. if that’s the case, how come only 2,000 people have visited this blog since last night? Something doesn’t add up. Katy Perry up. She has huge boobs. Think I’m gonna watch this whole performance. Hoping for a wardrobe malfunction. Not loving this song though. I miss Vegas. Due for a trip soon. Been 11 months. Too long. Wonder how much flights are right now. FF.
10:56 Finally. Dim the lights. Here we go. Kris!!! I love his wife. I think she has fake contacts lenses with dollar signs on them. Pretty sure I just saw that.
10:57 Danny or Adam. I’m saying America fucked up.
10:58 Adam!!!! I was really worried that it was going to be Gokey. That would have been crazy.
10:58 Quick Gokey recap on TV. Pretty psyched for the finale next week. Think there couldn’t be too more opposite singers. Should be really interesting. Was just about to fast forward and TiVo cut out. Damn you TiVo. not that I wanted to watch Gokey sing again, but I mean really. The fucking thing cut out last year on the finale, and I won’t let that happen again!
11:00 Your results are coming shortly. Chiiiillllll. 24 minutes start to finish. Not bad.
Just a couple comments on the results:
1) Nice moves in the pool this week by Amy Schneider (-45), Ruth Rivard (-28), and Jess Miller (-16). Really nailed the Gokey pick.
2) I’ve crunched the numbers. I’ve run every possible results secnario. If people want me to post the possible outcomes, please vote in the poll below. I’ll make my decision on Friday.